NEQ Fun Run report

[Brett Dikeman]

Yes, it was a wild, wacky little trip today.

Turned out -no one- met me in white plains, which was fine, because I 
had left the old V1 and my cell back at the apartment.  I arrive 
about 15 minutes late at Amenia to find Darin and family with the 
newly aquired V8q(more on this later.)  Larry turns up eventually, 
and gets harassed for it.  Darin returns from the ATM, and we zoom 
off in search of clocks.  We get there -really- late and find 
Ron+family waiting....Frank+ Better Half show up shortly thereafter.

We tour the museum, which does indeed have a boatload of clocks of 
all kinds.  We feel kind of ripped off, because they're all 
-completely- out of sync and half of them don't work.  Great.  And we 
tried to get in BEFORE the hour because the guide said they're all 
set the same and chime in unison.  Phhbt.

If Team Doorhandle built a clock, we found it.  This contraption had 
a pentulum that consisted of an arm, with a chain at the end, and a 
small lead weight at the end of the chain.  Situated at opposite ends 
of the arm's 180 degree swing from left to right is a little post; 
it's arranged with some other little devices so that the wire is 
guided onto the post, the ball wraps around the post, unwraps, 
re-wraps in a sightly different way, and then unwraps and flings the 
arm back 180 degrees at the other post.  Repeat.

This is quite possibly the most amusing way of keeping time.  The 
card below the clock stated that it was the oddest clock in the 
collection, and that, incidentally, it keeps horrible time.  Again, 
team doorhandle at work.

We also discovered numerous interesting contraptions, including an 
1800's version of the now omnipresent changing ad displays..you know, 
the billboards and other signs that change every 5 seconds?)  This 
one was exactly the same idea, with three drums each with 3 ads on 
them, rotating every 5 minutes to a new ad(as Larry said, "A simpler 
time, with longer attention spans" :-)

There was a minor escapade when the largest in the collection(2 
floors, roughly, and several hundred pounds of counterweight) let out 
a distinctly unhealthy "twing!" when a bunch of us were staring at 
us.  We vacated immediately, fearing temporary trans-mojonation of 
Audi Gods to the clock from one of us(and the wrath of whomever is 
big enough to wind said clock, lest they be around.)

Gathered everybody, snapped a set of pic's for a panorama, figured 
out the #$!@% maps the Delorme program printed out, and started back.

Well, we got about 4-5 miles before we notice that half the group is 
missing.  WTF?  I tell Ron+Larry to stay put for the moment, and go 
V8 hunting.  I discover Darin, family, and V8q on a side-street with 
the hood up.  Hey, that's not too cool.

Frank goes off and collects Ron+Larry, and we start pouring over the 
car. Symptoms are that it suddenly started surging really badly, then 
died. Now it -barely- starts.  We pull the airbox cover, peek/poke 
around, try it again.  Starts and stays running only with moderate 
throttle.  Soon as he lets his foot off, that's that.  So, we 
poke+prod some more, and Larry+I both notice smoke wafing out from 
what seems like the middle of the engine, under the intake 
manifold(I'd like to go on record as saying the V8q has the damn 
strangest intake path I've ever seen) and coming up around the 
throttle area.  Hmm.  Only when he cranks it.  Hmm.

Well, I give Joe Fritz a call, he has no clue("Smoke?  Oh my, that's 
not good" :-) but suggests we phone Mike Larosa.  Mike's a little 
puzzled to get a call from me, but is most helpful.  We start asing 
questions, one thing leads to another, and someone hits upon a 
crankcase breather hose.  So we ask...where are they, Mike?  We get 
through checking the top one(oke-dokey; the previous owner was kind 
enough to replace it with standard radiator hose), the back 
one(perfect shape, not squishy or anything) and then we get to the 
front one, which sits to the right of the throttle and is tucked 
behind a whole lot of crap and is underneath the intake manifold for 
the most part.)

Hmm.  Hey, where exactly is it?

Well, there's about half an inch still attached at both ends, but the 
middle part is nowhere to be found...and I mean nowhere.  So, there's 
basically a dime-sized hole through which massive amounts of 
unmetered air is entering the engine.  Duuuuh.  No wonder it won't 
start.  And the smoke is probably crankcase gasses.

We inform Mike that we've found the problem.  Darin and I jump into 
the Big Baby and zoom off to the parts store, conveniently located 
about 200 feet from the V8's temporary resting spot.  The counter 
staffer locates some heater hose(hey, worked for the top hose, why 
not?) and gives us a foot long piece.

We return(after picking up 2 gallons of gas, just to be sure that's 
not also a problem; the fuel sender's status is 'unknown' after a 
recent FP change), find the hose is quite a tight fit.  However, Ron, 
enterprising individual of the day, manages to twist, bend, wiggle 
and shove the hose down and onto the nipple buried down in the 
engine.  Ron also manages, with some more magic, to get the top part 
of the hose(trimmed to fit) onto the nipple on the intake manifold, 
part of which we had removed.  We replace it, and Darin fires up the 
car...perfect.  A test drive reveals it's in fine working order, and 
the car performs flawlessly for the rest of the trip(or at least 
Darin didn't say anything :-)

So, the lunch stop(by now, it's 1:30pm) becomes the McDonald's(also 
located about 200 feet away.)  "Close your eyes, pretend you're in a 
neat converted barn restaurant and eating a nice homemade burger..."

We decide to drop north adams as well as the long-since-passed lunch 
stop in NY...bolt straight for Lenox, and hang out there.   We get 
there mostly without incident(stopped once to make sure we were going 
the right way), enjoying the scenery the entire time.  As far as 
timing goes, we were a little on the late side; a lot of trees near 
the roads were already bare, but there was plenty just a little bit 
further off.

Off we go, and arrive in Lenox center, at the local ice 
cream/coffee/pie/etc establishment...hang out, talk audis and other 
misc stuff...meanwhile, seems Ron&Darin's kids got along perfectly 
the entire time and were having more fun than anybody else(during the 
breakdown, the beached V8's interior became a romp room.)


Total drive time for me, including to the meeting place and back from 
Lenox home, was 7:57.  Total mileage, 232.2 miles.  Oy.  Pardon me 
while I go crash into bed....

And incidentally, the car hit 150,000 miles 3/4 of the way home from Lenox :-)

B
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Brett Dikeman				Systems Engineer
CFN(formerly iClick, Inc)			914-872-8043
120 Bloomingdale Rd.			914-872-8100(fax)
White Plains, NY 10605			http://www.iclick.com
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