Audis on TV

[Mike Arman]

Ahh, good old 'Murrican trash! Yeeehah!

In the good old days when sex was safe and driving was dangerous, there was
nothing on the planet that could keep up with some of the rude, crude
musclecars that came out of Dee-troit, cast iron pushrod engines and all.

Anyone want to drag race against a 426 Hemi Chrysler with two big, thirsty
four barrel carbs? Maybe a 427 Corvette? Heck, how about a Chevvy pickup
truck with a 454? Remember, in a straight line, nothing beats cubic inches,
especially if those already ample inches have been breathed upon by some
very sharp hot-rodders. - Let's see, add an Isky cam, headers, and assorted
other doo-dads that can be bought right off the shelf at Honest Charlie's
(real company!) Speed Emporium. Now let's really go berserk and add nitrous.

Tell you what - there STILL isn't anything that will out-drag these antique
beasts, even at ten times the price.

No, they won't go around corners, but that isn't what they were selling,
and more importantly, not what the customers were particularly interested
in buying. 

We are talking mind-numbing, G-suit acceleration - some of these cars were
so strong that they could slow the rotation of the earth!

As a matter of fact, if you look closely at the rear hull of the Millenium
Falcon, as he is blasting out of Dantueen just ahead of Darth Vader's
henchmen, on the lower left, there's a little sticker that says "Hemi
Power." Then he floors it . . .

Best Regards,

Mike Arman

(As everyone scurries off to find a tape of Star Wars and check for the
sticker . . . )