[s-cars] NAC: 997GT3RS WOTage - muwhahaha pardon

[pkrasusky at ups.com]

//Sooooooooooooooooooo...

With //SFest planning in Top Gear, Mr. Let Me LRP His 996GT3 got his
997GT3RS delivered whilst I was away beaching for 2 weeks - yes - to
*add* to his 996.  Oy, is right.  Come on down, he says, whenst we
arrived home Friday.  Oooooookaaaaaaay.  The two garage doors go up and
reveal a fiiiiiiine pair of ohso similar yet ohso different arses - my
knees shudder.  Silence overcomes me, and I bask in more than a few
moments of WTF this is truly JNR incarnate.

The 997 easily makes the 996 appear somehow pedestrian, not to mention
diminutive.  Maybe it's all the orange?  Regardless, it's much more the
eye catcher - which is of course good and bad.  After sizing them up and
comparing / contrasting, he opens the 997's RS scripted door for me -
I'm up by the LF wheel and am suddenly overcome with the rather overt
waft of Alcantara yumminess.  Carbon sill plates with translucent blue
illuminated GT3RS script in case you needed a reminder of what you were
about to embark upon.

997s have certainly benefited from some much needed cockpit updating and
it's immediately evident.  Everything is just better, is all.  A quick
row through the gears to practice the gate reveals a most impressive
snicketysnick of the 6gang lever - it cannot be 3" of travel and feels
akin to the bolt action of a rifle.  The key is passed over and inserted
- hey what can I say - we've been in each other's weddings and been pall
bearers for each other's fathers ya know.  The familiar starter
whirlover gives way to the eggbeater boxer six rasp and a deeply mellow
very evidently cam'd idle.  Hey look mom - a silencing valve as been
added and all can be quite - but what would that point be?

Cockpit familiarity settles me in and down, it's time to negotiate
reverse and the tea tray rear spoiler.  Clutch surprisingly not too
sticky whatwith 143 virgin miles on the odo.  Of primary notice thus far
is the fact that somehow Stuttgart adheres each RS brake pedal to your
central nervous system.  Think the word "brake" and before the grit in
the sole of my size 10's has touched the brushed center pedal the Carbon
Ceramic's are there suggesting to you that they're imminently more
capable than you.  Better feel even than the F550M which heretofore was
my previous fave.

Troll into traffic and temps warm, it's go time.  A quick paradoxical
reminder to meself is the 143 mile odo and the EIGHTY FOUR HUNDERED RPM
redline.  Sigh.  "Four to five K-range" will have to suffice tonight,
the post-1k mile WOT whomps will come soon enough next visit afterall.
Windows down for the full aural assault until we get a good going along,
then up for the real treat of having that lump wailing away just feet
from your lobes.  Power really surges on at 4,600, and 1st / 2nd
upshifts come entirely too quick @ foot to the floor launches - 5,200
BAM shift.  Again, sigh.  It allows opportunity to bask in other virtues
than all out rawness.  First is this thing, as you've well read, is
nearly too easy to drive.  It seems to do no wrong, and does not
transmit much of any road harshness or tire whump into the cabin.  I
keep the suspension in normal mode as we meander along the CT river
stringing "Scenic Road Next 5 miles" stretches together and together,
all the while fending off a relentless Jeep Cherokee intent on keeping
that tea tray lit up with his brown lights even during the passing
zones.  Whatever, get used to 'that' certainly.

Thirty miles later and I joke about heading west until we hit shore -
this thing is just too inviting to stop and put and end to this sheer
hedonistic bliss.  Pulling back in alongside the 996, he hands over its
keys and utters the three words you just can't make up - "take it home"
- it being the red belted silver 996.  I can't, I've come down tonight
in dad-in-law's Tundra as Alumibitch is in for prolonged warranty work
(God BLESS Great Lakes and my rear main seal look ma no trans!).  I
CAN'T.  Nope.

But I cannot can't.  It's the wrong answer, but so is no.  I'm 50 miles
away, "see you sometime tomorrow evening" is mumbled as all too easily
make the wrong (right) decision and I giddily embark home solo in the
6,100 mile '04.  Great time to trade notes.

As it beckons WOT 8k upshifts it's quickly noticeable just how well the
997's suspension is sorted.  The 996 fights you with extremely notable
bump steer that I remember whilst lapping LRP, enough so that full
throttle upshifts mid corner with any bumps does make you feel like
Rohrl with lightning quick hand off the wheel grab your shift then hand
back on wheel - forearms reminding you what's happening all the while
this ain't no ride for the squeamish.  The 997 has a slightly more
baritone soundtrack but this thing's got Fabspeed cans so it's a tough
comparo.  It's also quite clear how much more peppily this little thing
scoots what being broken in and all.  Sure the surge that hits @
6,200rpm burying the tach to red doesn't hurt either yeah.  

Even more clear is how annoying every Integra With A Fartcan the thing
attracts, even @ midnight.  Begone, already.  Waking up the next a.m.
and looking outside, my wife utters "what did you do???" wondering where
her dad's truck was heh heh.  Only way to pacify that is to go show her,
her first outing in a Porsche.  Even better, what else does one do with
"GT3 For A Day" anyway???  Hmmmm, well, for starters?  You want the
truth you can't handle the truth - Home Depot, Lowes, Target, Linen's &
Things, Michaels, Mall, Stop & Shop.  See hunny, it *is* a practical
daily driver - fits a decent grocery shopping for our family of 5,
clothes, a toilet seat cover, and a new shoe rack right?  Now, sign
here...

The plan WAS to return it last night having my local GT2 friend Brian
follow me down so the three of us could head out for some GT
//Shenanigans, but that fell through so I journeyed downstate solo and
reluctantly handed over the key.  Boy does that thing fit me well -
working on wife / him to entertain extendedextendedextended terms on it
heh heh.  Poof - wakes up.  

Really tho, don't take my word for any of this no.  All of this and
more, here for your fingerbanging enjoyment in a mere five days here in
Sunny CT.  Beware, as alwayz...

Muwhahahahaa, pardon.

-Paul it's a tough job but someone's gotta do it K.