[V8] Flashing codes- was transmission woes part Duex

[J123fs@aol.com]

Hey folks,
Thanks again for all your help with the regard to my transmission woes. 
I dried the car out quite well, heater on full all carpets out, ect.
Here's the rub: I tried to pull the codes but got nothing- the LED stayed  
lit and did not flash. 
I jumpered the setup exactly as the SJM site says and got nothing. Tried  
jumper in for 4 seconds, 6, the 8,10, but nothing. I put a fuse into the fuel  
pump relay, and tried the various time intervals all to no avail. 
What am I doing wrong, that is, besides not driving the car down to  local 
boat ramp and giving it a Viking funeral?
Again, anyone got some good BTDT? 
Anyone in southern NH near 93 with a Ross-tech or other Audi computer code  
reader? Would consider paying most reasonable bribes of cash, beer, ect for the 
 time.
Thankfully I have other cars to drive, but a VW convertible or my van  are 
not ideal commuter rigs. It is too much to ask that the V8 to behave well?  Oh 
well!
Thanks in advance,
Jack