[V8] V8 Neurosis

[Roger Woodbury]

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Message: 1
Date: Tue, 05 May 2009 16:38:57 -0400
From: Mike Arman <Armanmik at earthlink.net>
Subject: [V8] The neurosis spreads!
To: v8 at audifans.com
Message-ID: <4A00A3E1.3070405 at earthlink.net>
Content-Type: text/plain; charset=ISO-8859-1; format=flowed



Doctor Roger, Doctor Roger, PLEEEZE help meeeee . . .


1) No it doesn't cost me much for it to sit there (just plates and
insurance, which I can live with)

2) No there's nothing much wrong with it, all the major issues have been
solved and most of the 
minor ones as well (beyond the fuel pump, no cruise control which I don't
use anyway, and one ABS 
sensor isn't right, but really, that's about it.)

3) I do have room for it, and it isn't actually in my way very much

4) I know I won't see anything like reasonable money if I sell it - $4K is a
fever dream, $2.5K is 
the very high end of just barely possible (not because the car isn't any
good, it is the market for 
these things that sucks), under $2k I'll for damn sure keep it.

5) If I used it as a trade in ("If it runs, we'll give you $5,000,000
towards your new crapmobile!") 
I wouldn't be getting anything I really want anyway.

6) I do have (plenty) of alternate transportation, including a 2001 adnoH
Accord with under 50K on 
it - came out of an estate.

7) I don't "need" the money to buy something else. 2K isn't going to make or
break the deal.

8) As Dave Head so scathingly put it, I don't EVER let go of ANYTHING - why
should I, and what would 
I replace it with? After all, he's seen my garage, and Dave, if you thought
the garage was full, 
come look at my new hangar!!! (Actually I do let go of stuff sometimes -
when Cody Forbes took all 
my 5 cylinder stuff, he had to make two trips with a Dually 454 Chebby
pickup and a huge trailer, 
and the second trip brought the mighty big block to its' knees, he smoked
the clutch on the way home.)

Problem is that I'm getting spoiled by the Accord. The damn thing just runs.
Zero maintenance, zero 
oil leaks, zero electrical problems, starts every time, and I don't have to
worry about someone 
tapping it in a parking lot and busting one of the unobtanium big-buck
Eurolights. The car is 
utterly soul-less, boring, dull, insipid, uninspiring, common . . . but it
always goes . . . (so 
far, anyway). Been two years now, other than oil changes at 7,500 miles -
nothing! (Well one set of 
brake pads when I got it, and a headlight bulb.)


So Doctor Roger, I fear I am beginning to stray . . . I find myself casting
envious eyes at 350CLK 
convertibles and the stray Boxster . . . I've even considered building a
Force Five knockoff Cobra 
(but I have serious doubts as to its crashworthyness, so I'll probably pass
on that car).


What do I do? What do I do? Keep it in hibernation and go play amongst the
various automotive 
diversions and delights offered to me? Stay faithful, fix it and roar off
happily into the sunset in 
a cloud of burnt Pentosin? Sell it and regret it forever? I'm so conflicted
. . . help me . . . sob 
. . .


Best Regards,

Mike Arman
90V8Q (so far)



Well, the bare truth is that there is no cure!  

A 350CLK has nothing in common with the V8 aside from having four wheels.
Yes, you can buy one and get some fun out of it, so long as the weather is
good and the road is dry.  But if you need to be out and about or get caught
in a sudden snowy flurry, you will not have the feel of security that the V8
can give.

A Porsche Boxster?  Oh, dear.  I fear not.  Again, we are not talking about
the same thing.  If you want a little two seater, then the V8 isn't part of
the discussion.  If you want a SPORTS CAR, then at least pick something that
is in the same general class as the V8 was when it was new.  How about a
Carrera 4, perhaps?  At least all four wheels will give traction when you
really need it.

And yes, there is a sort of attractiveness to the Accomry (take your pick!).
I re-established a very old relationship with a fine woman from Cape Cod
about ten years ago.  We had been friends back along the dawn of time when I
wore a blue uniform and her ex-husband was my boss.  She had a Camcord...no
it was a CAMRY as I recall.  It was a "nice" car.  We traveled a bit in it
on the Interstate, and it was pretty smooth and comfortable.  I drove it and
felt it a very "nice" car.

If I had any sense at all, I would buy one and forget all about the V8.  The
Camcord gets better fuel mileage and probably will cost a LOT less to keep
running...probably even the tires are cheaper (although the V8 tires are
pretty cheap now in this day of 39" wheels).  

But I am not yet ready for a Camcord just as I am not yet ready for a
walker.  Hell's Bells:  I just took my license renewal eye test and they
deleted my corrective lens endorsement because my eyesight has "improved" to
the point that I do not need to wear glasses to drive any more.  

So for me, a Accomry is not an option.  I am not sure that I could really
live with one on our Maine twisties, and I might hurt myself wondering if
the thing might hold the line if I went just a tad faster through the wicked
chicane down on the Mud Creek Road.  

Nope.  I'll stick to my V8, and I strongly suggest that you do so also.  Put
it away, maybe.  Go out and buy the funkly little fun car if you like, but
keep the 'sensible' Audi all weather, all time best sedan for those days
when the weather might look like it will be too sour for the "little one",
or when you just plan want to feel what a big, powerful German sedan can
do...and on the cheap, besides.

The only CURE that might be considered to be one, is to have at least ONE V8
at all times. It's sort of an Audi equivalent to methodone.  So long as the
dosage is there, bigger and worse afflictions are kept at bay, or at least
in control.

So keep you V8 and ponder it at your leisure.  Without it all that will be
left is lament.

Dr. Roger

(Incidentally, my degree is from Beentheredonethat U.