[V8] C4

[Mike Arman]

"Front towards enemy" - aw heck, I just KNEW something was wrong here . . .


Regarding mobile field artillery, however (which I can tow behind my Audi V8 - end of Audi content), 
let me tell you a little story.


As we are all aware, we are now in the "assignment of blame and punishment of the innocent" phase of 
the banking and foreclosure crisis. The bad guys, the root cause, the evil people who caused the 
entire worldwide financial system to simultaneously melt down and freeze up are - wait for it - the 
MORTGAGE BROKERS.

I should know, I am one. (I became a mortgage broker on the advice of my parole officer.) I held a 
gun to the lender's heads to force them to offer NINJA loans (no job, no income, no assets) at 125% 
loan to value. I held the appraiser's puppies hostage so they would overvalue houses. I fed bad acid 
to Wall Street so they would package and collateralize huge chunks of essentially worthless loans 
and collect vast commissions. I twisted the arms of pension funds, insurance companies, and 
investors everywhere to buy these worthless "securities". And of course, I used a cattle prod to 
entice people to buy homes they KNEW they couldn't afford - and I even told them not to buy, 
whereupon they went down the street to someone who WOULD push the paper, 'cause I wouldn't.

Anyway - here's my punishment:

States no longer issue mortgage broker licenses. It is now federal, but I still have to take a state 
test, pass a state background check and have a state fingerprint card. I ALSO have to take a federal 
test, pass a federal background check, and have a federal fingerprint card. I have to tell them 
where I have lived and EVERY business of any kind I have been involved in for the past ten years. 
Every document and statement has to be sworn and notarized as well. The annual fees are around 
$1,100, and oh yeah, they get to check my credit too. The license is good for ONE YEAR, start again 
in advance of 1/1/12, processing time is presently estimated at 14 months - my license will have 
expired before it was issued.

All this so I can lend someone $5,000 as a second mortgage on a mobile home . . .


So how does this relate to mobile field artillery?


Well, I also have a Federal Firearms License, Curio and Relic. This means I can buy, almost without 
restriction, weapons that are over 50 years old which are on the Federal C&R list - and there are 
LOT of them! One such weapon is a Lahti (Finnish) 20mm semi-automatic anti-tank gun, fully 
functional and for which I can buy ammunition and have it (and the gun) delivered right to my door, 
and I can then tow this thing around in public behind my Audi - and I DO know which end is the front 
of the Lahti!!!!!


What is involved in getting a license to own and operate this dedicated and quite capable implement 
of destruction? The FFL C&R license costs $30 for three years and you have to sign your name - an 
"X" in red crayon is sufficient. No fingerprints, no background check, no test, no nothing. If you 
have $30 and a crayon (red not required, any color will do), you qualify.

Yes, I know the pen is mightier than the sword, but do you think our gummint has somehow lost any 
sense of perspective here?

Best Regards,

Mike Arman
Prime candidate for Federal Re-Education Camps, where we know what is better for you than you do.