FW: [Fwd: more humor/wasted bandwidth]

["Linkov, Jonathan" <LinkovJ@nrf.com>]

 ----------
From: Roc
To: linkovj
Subject: [Fwd: more humor/wasted bandwidth]
Date: Sunday, October 19, 1997 10:52PM

A little more 'racing' humor: (apologizing in advance if this has already
been posted, or if anyone takes offense to the fact that it is non-Corvette
related)  :-)

You might be a racer if...

        1.You've paid $4.00 a gallon for gas without complaining.
        2.You've been known to yell "It means check your mirrors retard!" 

          at your television.
        3.You think the last line of the Star Spangled Banner is 

          "Gentlemen,start your engines!"
        4.You plan your wedding around the race schedule.
        5.Your're registered for wedding gifts at Pegasus and Racer 

          Wholesale.
        6.You refer to the corner down the street from your house as 

          "Turn One".
        7.You know the quarter mile times for your riding mower.
        8.You've embarrassed your spouse at least once by insisting on
                wearing your full face helmet while driving.
        9.You know the "racing line" for every turn on your daily 

          commute,including all your alternate routes, and practice 

    hitting them everyday.
        10.No tire dealer in town will honor their tread wear warranty on 

          any car that you've been seen near.
        11.You quote your street tire life in weeks rather than miles.
        12.You regularly live-test your rev-limiter on that straight 

          that's a little too long for second but not worth going 

    into third...
        13.Even if you don't have ABS, you never lock your brakes unless 

          you "really wanted to do that".
        14.You've started looking for sponsors for your daily commute, as
                well as your weekend hobby.
        15.You've slalomed in a construction zone and counted your 

          penalty time in the rearview mirror afterwards.