Re: Deutsches Car Weirdness

[CLIFFORD ILKAY <dinamis@interlog.com>]

At 11:53 PM 5/12/98 -0400, you wrote:
>"Al Powell" <apowell@agcom.tamu.edu> writes:
>>
>>Just so all we Audi owners don't think we're singled out for "better 
>>ideas" by German car designers....
>>
>>On the Mercedes list, they're discussing the fact that putting in the 
>>wrong (non-German) taillight lamps can fry the cruise control 
>>brain!!  Replacement $150, thanks a lot...
>>
>
>Dang, those are expensive lamps. Must be the two filament kind, huh?
>
>>Does this sound just a BIT familiar??????
>
>Um, no comment. Don't want to incur the wrath...
>
>Lee

This reminds me of:
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Think carefully about that next car purchase.  You may be saying more than you
want to!

What your car says about you:

Acura Integra           - I have always wanted to own the Buick of sports cars
Acura Legend            - I'm too bland for German cars
Acura NSX               - I am impotent
Audi 90                 - I enjoy putting out engine fires
Buick Park Avenue       - I am older than 34 of the 50 states
Cadillac Eldorado       - I am a very good Mary Kay salesperson
Cadillac Seville        - I am a pimp
Chevrolet Camaro        - I enjoy beating up people
Chevrolet Caprice       - I wear wide underwear;  see also Ford CV
Chevrolet Caprice 9C1   - I wear wide kevlar underwear and like donuts
Chevrolet Impala SS     - I wear Big Bad Black, Dark Cherry Metallic,or Dark
                          Grey Green Metallic wide underwear
Chevrolet Chevette      - I like seeing people's reactions when I tell them I
                          have a 'Vette
Chevrolet Corvair       - I like going out-of-control
Chevrolet Corvette      - I'm in a mid-life crisis, I wear gold chains
Chevrolet El Camino     - I am leading a militia to overthrow the government
Chrysler Cordoba        - I dig the rich Corinthian leather
Datsun 280Z             - I have a kilo of cocaine in my wheel well
Delorean                - (See above)
Dodge Dart              - I teach third grade special education and I voted
for
                          Eisenhower
Dodge Daytona           - I delivered pizza for four years to get this car
Dodge minivan           - We have children; (also see Volvo 740 wagon)
Ferrari ___             - I believe speed limits are suggestions
Ford Fairmont           - (See Dodge Dart)
Ford Mustang            - I slow down to 85 in school zones
Ford Crown Victoria     - I enjoy having people slow to 55mph and change lanes
                          when I pull up behind them
Ford Taurus SHO         - I wish I had an Impala SS
Geo Storm               - I will start the 11th grade in the Fall.
Geo Tracker             - I will start the 12th grade in the Fall.
Honda del Sol           - I have always said, half a convertible is better
than
                          no convertible at all
Honda Civic             - I have just graduated and have no credit
Honda Accord            - I lack any originality and am basically a lemming.
Infiniti Q45            - I am a physician with 17 malpractice suits pending.
Isuzu Impulse           - I do not give a rip about J.D. Power or his reports.
Jaguar XJ6              - I am so rich I will pay 60K for a car that is in the
                          shop 280 days per year.
Kia Sephia              - I learned nothing from the failure of Daihatsu
Corp.
Lincoln Town Car        - I live for bingo, covered dish suppers, and Depends
Mercury Grand Marquis   - (See above)
Mercedes 500SL          - I will beat you up if you ask me for an autograph
Mercedes 560SEL         - I have a daughter named Bitsy and a son named Cole
Mazda Miata             - I do not fear being decapitated by an
                          eighteen-wheeler
MGB                     - I am dating a mechanic
Mitsubishi Diamante     - I don't know what it means either
Nissan 300ZX            - I have yet to complete my divorce proceedings.
Oldsmobile Cutlass      - I just stole this car and I'm going to make a
Peugeot 505 Diesel      - I am on the EPA's Ten Most Wanted List
Plymouth Neon           - I sincerely enjoy doing the Macarena
Pontiac Trans AM        - I have a switchblade in my sock
Porsche 911             - I wish I had a Ferrari
Porsche 912             - I wish I had a 911
Porsche 944             - I am dating big haired women that otherwise would be
                          inaccessible to me
Rolls Royce Silver      - I think Pat Buchanan is a tad bit too liberal
Saturn SC2              - (See Honda Civic)
Subaru Legacy           - I have always wanted a Japanese car even more
Toyota Camry            - I am still in the closet
Volkswagen Beetle       - I still watch Partridge Family reruns
Volkswagen Cabriolet    - I am out of the closet
Volkswagen Microbus     - I am tripping right now
Volvo 740 Wagon         - I am frightened of my wife