FW: Joke, if MS made cars

[John Karasaki <johkar@teleport.com>]

>X-From_: atinker@CH2M.com Tue Sep 15 22:49:21 1998
>Delivered-To: johkar@teleport.com
>From: "Tinker, Angie/LRD" <atinker@CH2M.com>
>To: "'Alleson, Mom and Dad'" <itsgrama@aol.com>, "'Freemyer, Jane'"
>	 <JFREEMYER@aol.com>, 'Jessica' <jessmomx3@aol.com>, 
>	"'Johnson, Christina'" <JOHNSON.CHRISTINA_M@MARTINEZ.VA.GOV >, 
>	"'Karasaki, John and Liesl'" <johkar@teleport.com>, 
>	'Mark and Cindy Hetrick' <cindmark@LanMinds.Net>, 
>	"'McHugh, Josh and Kelly'" <hghvoltage@earthlink.net>, 
>	"'Pearson, Jeff, Kim, Allison'" <MRPANDMRSP@JUNO.COM>, 
>	"'Thompson, Mike & Diana'" <mrtdlt@aol.com>, "'Tinker, Sally'"
>	 <stinker@nextlink.net>, "'Williams, Doris E.'" <satinldy@peganet.com>
>Subject: FW: Windows 98
>Date: Tue, 15 Sep 1998 10:43:35 -0600
>X-Mailer: Internet Mail Service (5.5.2232.9)
>
>
>
>> Subject:	Windows 98
>> 
>> > 	At the unveiling of Windows 98 on June 25th, Microsoft Chairman
>> > Bill Gates
>> > compared the current state of personal computers with the early days
>> > of
>> > automobiles.  Should General Motors ever decide to respond, the
>> > company
>> > might issue a list to describe what cars would be like if designed by
>> > Microsoft:  
>> > 	1.  For no reason whatsoever, you car would crash twice a day.  
>> > 	2.  Every time they repainted the lines on the road, you would
>> > have to buy
>> > a new car.  
>> > 	3.  Occasionally, your car would die on the freeway for no
>> > reason, and you
>> > would just accept this, restart and drive on.  
>> > 	4.  Apple Computer would make a car powered by the sun,
>> > reliable, five
>> > times as fast, and twice as easy to drive, but it would only run on 5
>> > percent of the roads.  
>> > 	5.  Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn would
>> > cause
>> > your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would
>> > have
>> > re-install the engine.  
>> > 	6.  New seats would force everyone to have the same size butt.  
>> > 	7.  The air-bag system would say, "Are you sure?" before going
>> > off.  
>> > 	8.  Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock
>> > you out
>> > and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door
>> > handle,
>> > turned the key, and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.  
>> > 	9.  Every time GM introduced a new model, car buyers would have
>> > to learn
>> > how to drive all over again, because none of the controls would
>> > operate in
>> > the same manner as the old car.  
>> > 	10.  You'd press the "start" button to shut off the engine.  
>> > 
>> > 
>
>
Best Regards,

John Karasaki
Portland, OR