[s-cars] Hap's car is...wow.

[Paul.Park at colorado.edu]

It's not like I had gotten used to my car's power. I still can't launch it properly, but I like to blame that on my clutch. Anyways, I'd always figured my car to be fast. 0-60 in mid 6s to low 7s, good mid-range power, and all that amounted to be, what I thought, was a highway menace(Audi Pride is slowly coursing it's way through my body).

Yeah, that's all changed thanks to Hap. My car looks like poo, goes slow, and just...it left me a feeling of depression as great as the overwhelming awe I had when Hap went through his 6 speed gear box. I had never felt like this, so utterly powerless, (well, looking at my car would make anyone depressed), even staged against some new WRX'...but Hap's car is wow.

Now I wait to get my photo's developed of this momentous occasion. I'd like to see Hap's car in a setting other than Brian Powell's driveway(thanks for the Bra, bro) and from the inside. Such a subtle, yet imposing car. From the rear, you're treated to noticeably large dual tipped(stromung?) exhaust, and a little badging that probably doesn't do the car justice.

RS4? Is the RS4 even as fast as hap's car? It's an understated rear end to say the least. If you're going to have as fast a car as Hap's, entertain those in your wake. Big font bumper stickers? News ticker across the rear glass a la Stock ticker? I guess the understated look is okay. It's pleasant to look at to say the least.

Then you get to the front. All that's different is the RS badge, the Sport Grille, and...what's this? An FMIC? It's..so big...so shiny...so...it makes me wanna do the bad things I never said I would ever do.

You probably all know this. If you've never seen Hap's car in person and if he's never given you a ride...well run away if he ever offers you one. You will never feel satisfied in your life until you:
a)Buy Hap's Car
b)Buy Mike Pedersen's car
c)Buy both Mike and Hap's car, depriving the world of the fastest Ur S-cars on the planet..(Muahahahahaha)

But if he gives you a ride, and you're left with an optimistic set of goals...there's Hap's knowledge to set you back in place. An incredibly humble guy, but too knowledgeable for any S-Car owner's good. Happy with your stock setup? Not after five minutes conversing with Hap. Think you don't need an FMIC? Not after Hap gives you a rundown on the power gain benefits. Oh yeah...boost controllers not applicable to higher altitude cars? think again...you'll want everything aforementioned...and as long as you're talking to Hap about S-Cars...you'll never be content with the "optimistic goals" you had set in place before modding your plebian, stock S4s, before seeing Hap and his gracefully, imposing S-car.

I've run on for so long, but in short I'd like to voice my intentions. I want to have a car as fast as Hap's, and no more will I ever think about anything else BUT Hap's car. Don't get me wrong...meeting Hap was something in itself...it's just that goddess bitch Quattro that's so alluring, yet bad for my mental health.

If we could do this all over again, i'd have invited some Corvette guys for a shakedown with Hap's car. Better yet...some B5 S4s. Nothing feels as good as putting the smack down on some tiptronic lovin, B5 S4 yuppie(sorry if this offends anyone...actually I'm not:-D).

Paul
-incoherent, and still blabbing in Colorado

P.S. - Thanks...and a big NO THANKS;) to you, Hap