[s-cars] Quattro.... there is no substitute - just add JNR

[Mark Strangways]

I begin to fear JNR may in fact not quite provide a full and accurate 
depiction of you guys anymore.
We need to start looking for something a bit *stronger* :-)
JNR indeed...

Me poor Audi is sitting under a blanket with it's battery inside keeping 
warm.... I just can't seem to find the heart / time to go figure 8ing in it 
this year. Maybe next year after there are some scratches and dings in the 
paintwork.
I am sure of one thing, it will protest this spring and want a few thousand 
dollars worth of attention / retribution money for leaving it alone all 
winter.

Mark
----- Original Message ----- 
From: <pkrasusky at ups.com>
To: <s-car-list at audifans.com>; <wmahoney at disk.com>
Sent: Thursday, February 15, 2007 10:27 AM
Subject: Re: [s-cars] Quattro.... there is no substitute - just add JNR


>
> Taka Quattrolamented, Baloney confirmed, and Craig ponderedededed:
>
> <<<Date: Thu, 15 Feb 2007 00:12:50 GMT
> From: "lebakken1 at netzero.net" <lebakken1 at netzero.net>
> Subject: [s-cars] Quattro.... there is no substitute
>
> Bill shared:
>
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
>
> Yesterdaze chgo downfall left everyone here cryin like little weenie
> babies.
>
> Nothing ever passes the torsen diffed pig with Nokians.  Nothing.
>
> Everything else is an all seasoned Pacer (or is it a Matador?)
>
> And since all the babies had to leave early, it opened the parking lot
> for some figure 8's in 6" of fresh fluff.
>
> JNR
>
> Bill~so how do we get packed snow from the wheel rims~M
>
> <<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<
>
> Bill -
>
> You ain't seen weenie babies until you have seen 3-4" of snow fall
> into a Seattle rush hour. People will leave their cars JUST ABOUT
> ANYWHERE and walk. To where - I have no idea. Not all of these people
> can live that close. Just effin' amazing. Give up and walk. The next
> day the freeways, side roads - even the floating bridges across Lake
> Washington are littered with abandoned cars. Closest thing to
> Armageddon I have seen.
>
> My S4 mit new 215-55/16 Pilot Alpins goes anywhere. Only complaint -
> the Eibachs run pretty low.... The center torsen just rocks. I can
> only imagine how great it would be to have a rear one also. But the
> center diff lock took me to places others dared not go. With ease.
>
> I can't imagine the frustration of a Haldex trying to tell me how to
> drive without really know how itself. How can something like that get
> designed, produced, and sold?
>
> Also - pray tell, what does JNR mean??
>
> Craig
> 94 S4>>>
>
>
>
>
>
> Amen, me bruthas, amen.  4kq action here in CT was fun, passing in the
> unplowed left lane doing speed limit+.  Gottalove it.  This, after I ran
> out of gas (damn fuel leak) and THEN needed a jumpstart (damn f'n
> battery) - defer to fact I'm Polish.
>
> I arrived to the orifice yesterday to an email from an equally (is this
> possible) warped and twisted sicsic individual (scary thought)...  I
> just have to share:
>
> *******Dear Lord...
> Thank you for giving unto me the snowy commute this morning.
> Thank you for placing twisty hilly roads betwixt my house and office.
> Thank you Lord for granting me my twin cam Focus and for causing it to
> understeer until my inputs bring about predictable oversteer.
> Thank you for making my Focus so pleasing to drive on snow that I can
> leave my Porsche in the toasty garage and still giggle like a palsied
> retard while looking through the side glass to drive.
> Thank you, dear Maker, for causing my maturity to halt at 12 years old
> so that it would occur to me to pretend I was a World Rally driver this
> morning.
> And finally, while it may seem minor, if I might have just one moment of
> your precious time I would thank you for making the synchromesh and for
> causing the engineers to refine them to such an extent I can slam my rig
> into reverse while the front wheels are still moving forward and the
> ebrake is locking the rears so that I can pirouette in the Xtra Mart
> parking lot like a homo in ballet slippers.
> You are a generous and benevolent God.
> Amen*********
>
> Man, that's some funny sheeeat.  This is the guy that stoved the large
> tree atop me street in his S60 coming in a bit 'hot' one evening.  Hard.
> Ooops.
>
> Jah Baloney, same here - waited till all the drones rushed outta here in
> a panic and had the backlot to meself for JNR figure8ing.  So fun, so
> juvenile.  WRT snow removal from wheels, man I hate that.  Feels like if
> you proceed every nut and bolt will shudder clear off the car.  I either
> heat my brakes up to 9 quabillion jules (not ideal) or keep a uberpov
> snow brush in the car - brush on wood stick with scraper end removed -
> and poke out the spokes.  Works well.
>
> Craig, Cody, et al...  JNR???  Falling asleep in class here again I see.
> Well, first, as with all things - Blame Baloney - he coined it.  What is
> it?  Hmmm...  it sorta defies definition / description.  Some sorta
> spiritual embodiment that one needs years of years of
> sicwarpedtwistedness to finely and properly hone.  A virtue not for the
> squeamish / faint of constitution.  One of dem You want the Truth You
> can't HANDLE the Truth sorta thangs really.
>
> -Paul not particularly, at all, whatsoever, Right, K.
>
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