[s-cars] new @ Hurtz

[Pasqualoni, James E]

PK OJ'd
"- Volvo S80 is muchmuchmuch more capable a cavitating holeshot (wheels
a go front wards / car a goes back wards) contender than you might think
and gladly absorbs NYC's finest potholes under full heavy braking /
powerslide withonly a hint of wheelbearingnoise found the next a.m..
BTW, 5mph rolling into Park evokes valet's into exclamating "you all are
trying to break that there car now aren't you" - why yes - yes - yes, we
are.  Warning!!!: - pirouetting through random water masses with windows
a down willst render you weteth.  Beware!!!:  - beachsanddunes will
catch you air.  Repeatedly."

and:

"Mmmm...  Hurtz.  And, there's nothing 10,000,000cp cannot illuminate,
minds aside. "

Especially large men in delivery trucks who repeatedly then exit said
truck and approach said S80 trying to extricate operator of 10,000,000
cp light for purposes of much bloody pummeling.  D'oh!


________________________________

	From: pkrasusky at ups.com [mailto:pkrasusky at ups.com] 
	Sent: Wednesday, February 28, 2007 1:52 PM
	To: s-car-list at audifans.com
	Cc: wmahoney at disk.com; s6serge at verizon.net; Pasqualoni, James E;
joe.pizzimenti at gmail.com; jnorris at usgs.gov; rpastore at animalfeeds.com
	Subject: RE: new @ Hurtz
	
	


	Bill Hurtz'd:
	
	<<<Date: Wed, 28 Feb 2007 10:41:29 -0600 
	From: "Bill Mahoney" <wmahoney at disk.com> 
	Subject: [s-cars] new @ Hurtz 

	FYI FWIW, or something: 

	"Hertz Prestige Collection Models: 

	Audi A6 Quattro Jaguar S-Type 
	Audi A8L Quattro Jaguar X-Type 
	Audi S4 Cabriolet Jaguar XJ8 
	Cadillac Escalade Land Rover LR3 
	Cadillac STS Lincoln Aviator 
	Cadillac XLR Lincoln LS 
	HUMMER H2 Lincoln Navigator 
	Infiniti FX35 Volvo S80 Sedan 
	Infiniti Q45 Volvo V70 Cross Country XC 
	Infiniti QX56 
	Special Hertz Services: 
	For Prestige Collection Renters 
	Complimentary NeverLost? In-Car Navigation System -- Drive with
confidence 
	no matter where you are. ((Where? ever you are?)) All Prestige
Collection 
	Vehicles come equipped with NeverLost the GPS In-Car Navigation
Satellite 
	System - or their own factory installed navigation system.
NeverLost? 
	functions as an automated navigator providing voice ((Help!
Help! Help!))and 
	visual directions as you drive from your current location to
your next 
	destination." 

	S4 Cabriolet? 
	THIS is trouble for an undisclosed location. 
	Bill~OGOLON~M>>> 




	JNR excerpts / Sgt. Schultz seyz: 

	- Volvo S80 is muchmuchmuch more capable a cavitating holeshot
(wheels a go front wards / car a goes back wards) contender than you
might think and gladly absorbs NYC's finest potholes under full heavy
braking / powerslide withonly a hint of wheelbearingnoise found the next
a.m..  BTW, 5mph rolling into Park evokes valet's into exclamating "you
all are trying to break that there car now aren't you" - why yes - yes -
yes, we are.  Warning!!!: - pirouetting through random water masses with
windows a down willst render you weteth.  Beware!!!:  - beachsanddunes
will catch you air.  Repeatedly.

	- Most sadly, S80 round deux didn't fare as well - CV click
aside, 6k rpms and 3 mph trying to ascend a 0.00001% grade can be
problematic whilst trying to escape from Brooklyn  - thankgooooodness
for Crooklynite window smashy to give reason for midday exchange - NOTE
- Hurtz's finest near almost HELPED me transfer large quantities of
cones from said trunk to said replacement.  Huh.

	  
	- Lincoln LS V8 can be lulled into secret misfire mode when run
@ the limiter too long (not neaaaaaaarly as long as say the Mazda 6 4
banger - read - entire length of I70 along the Gulf Coast from  Alabammy
to New Orleans in 3rd gear @ limiter - why - because), but the LS proved
to otherwise be *quite* the brakestanding cavitating holeshotting cone
sometimesdodging sometimes not surprisingly entertaining contender it
did (reference picture) 

	<<DSC03568.JPG>> 
	- Jag XJ8s should be broken in more slightly more than say 250
miles on odo before rental they should - purple smoke isn't normal you
say???  And Hurtz really should consider shaving them $$$$ Michelin's
down to prevent turning them into something that looked rather chunky
and cheesegrated they should.  11:1 compression and a slight dampness to
the road willllllllll produce Guinness Book material for Comic Book
Guy's _longest_holeshot_ever_ award.  Would still be spinning had I not
lifted I fear, 2 years later.  Electrohydraulic ebrakes are Bizarro JNR
material - and - near worrisomely - can appear to remain engaged despite
one's best efforts.

	- HELP!HELP!HELP! can only be uttered by RS4 Nav Chics - with
Serge sawing at the wheel >>> my endeavor to run the autox entirely in
1st gear - at the limiter - while did prove to invoke Fastest Time of
Day did not invoke said Nav Chic oddly enough.  Hmph, I say.

	- Mercury Marquiseseses produce fine and not particularly hard
to induce eu de Burnt Action Figure odiferous odors that permeate heater
vents and render your sinuses defenseless, also sticking to your
clothes, hair, skin, etc.

	- Chevy Trailblazer SWB's can be surprisingly adept at cone
sometimes dodging sometimes not, and, in RWD mode brakestandholeshots
are yer friend.  Especially adept at forging curbs.  Happy to wag the
tail under throttle provocation.

	- AnythinganythingANYthing Quattro scripted is NOT your friend
at Undisclosed Locations involved in Undisclosed Activities.  Witness
//Serge //Smellybadclutchbake.  

	- Lastly, rentalcops in rusty S10s managed to damper the fun the
last 1.5x - now THAT'S JNR. 

	You Want the Truth You Can't Handle The Truth.  Avoid "executive
lease" used car deals I always say.  And tire pressure gauges sold @
midnight @ Brooklyn corner stores should really read to higher than 55 -
and NYC's finest don't even raise a brow to two white boys exiting with
doublefisted Becks Kingers.  Hmmmm.

	Mmmm...  Hurtz.  And, there's nothing 10,000,000cp cannot
illuminate, minds aside. 

	-JNR hisself