Re: Darwin Award... No Audi Content, thankfully

[Kwattro@aol.com]

In a message dated 97-05-09 21:41:39 EDT, you write:

<< Ever heard of the Darwin Award?  I've forgotten who gives it but is an
award
 given, posthumously, to the person that kills themselves in the most
creative
 fashion and thereby proving 'survival of the fittest.'
 
 Seems that our west somewhere at the end of a several mile-long straight the
 highway turns at the foot of a mountain.  One morning the highway patrol
found
 what they thought was an airplane crash at the bottom of the mountain right
at
 the turn, still smoking and virtually no recognizable pieces.  After
 considerable research and lab analysis they figured out what had happened.
 This
 guy had gotten hold of a JATO rocket, probably from one of those surplus
 warehouses, and thought it would be neat to strap it into the trunk of his
'76
 Impala and see how fast it would go.  
 
 Now a JATO rocket is designed to boost heavily laden cargo  aircraft from
short
 fields into the air.   It is not uncommon for these aircraft to weigh
200,000lb
 and they use these rockets in groups of six or eight.  
 
 So he straps this thing in the trunk and drives out to this straight streach
and
 fires the JATO unit.  They found burn marks on the road where he must have
 launched and analysis indicated he hit the mountain side about four miles
away
 in about 60sec, at a speed of about 350mph, about 150ft above the road.
 They
 found the brakes were burned off the car well before impact and the tires
were
 probably shredded during the second mile.  The identity of the driver was
never
 determined as there was not enough left for a conclusive DNA test.  In fact
the
 only evidence the car had been inhabited was some teeth imbedded in the
steering
 wheel.  Whether the teeth were imbedded befor or after the impact was not
 established.  
 
 
 
 ... makes me feel not-quite-so-stupid when I hit my head on a kitchen
cabinet
 door.
 
 Regards, Gross Scruggs
  >>


This is a pretty old story, the guy the year before died trying to get a free
candy bar by rocking the vending machine.  It fell on him, and crushed him to
death.  Let it also be noted that JATO rockets are solid fuel, and therefor
cannot be shut off once ignited.  I think it was a pretty good idea, just
horribly executed.

Kwattro