Don't try it (Was: Deer-proofing an Audi)

["Shaun D. Mullen" <smullen@philly.infi.net>]

Justin Fidler wrote:
> > Subject: Re: Deer-proofing an Audi
I remember always being warned that deer will just stand there and stare
> at your headlights.  So, if you're in a situation where you need the deer
> to move (no way to steer around them), would it be enough just to turn off
> your headlights?  I've never had a chance to try this out, since I live
> too close to the city.

Don't try it.  We use but a fraction of our gray matter.  Deer are maxed
out brain-wise just getting through the day.  Reacting to and chosing an
appropriate response when confronted by a moving machine with bright
lights that smells weird, makes threatening noises, then stops but
continues to smell weird and make threatening noises, pretty much puts
your average deer well beyond its smarts limit.  (By comparison, horses
and goats are rocket scientists.)  Creating further confusion by
switching off your lights risks inappropriate behavior, like the deer
running full tilt into your lovely Audi.

Try to keep a safe distance.  Be patient.  Sooner or later, the deer
will figure out you're not gonna move, so it moves.  Be patient.  The
deer usually retreats back in the direction it came from.  If it came
down a steep embankment that it can't get back up, find reverse and give
the deer even more room to sleuth out an escape route.  Did I say be
patient?

Good lights help, but the best accessory is that unused portion of your
own brain that you need to engage when in deer country.  Don't speed. 
Scan both sides of the road.  Be especially vigilant at dusk and dawn,
all the more during the autumn months when the boy deer are chasing the
girl deer.  This routine has become second nature to me over the years,
and it's saved my ass multiple times.  In 10/93, I was doing 45-50mph on
a secondary road just after dawn in a 100CSQW.  I knew this particular
stretch was frequently crossed by deer.  I scanned the field to the
right and saw a young buck galloping toward the road.  I hit the brakes
hard.  The deer nearly made it, but winged the driver's side front
headlamp with a rear leg.  The impact spun the deer head over hooves
past the driver's side window, knocking the side-view mirror from the
cowling.  Had I not seen the deer and not have been stopped, or nearly
stopped, there is no question the deer would bounced onto my hood and
come through my windshield.