Fw: Some humor (No Real Audi Content)

[tsal2@juno.com (Timothy C Salazar II)]

For all us car lovers that like to drive "spiritedly"...

Top 21 things not to say to a cop when he pulls you over:
>
>* I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer.
>* Sorry officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't
>  plugged in.
>* Aren't you the guy from the village people?
>* Hey, you must have been doing 125 to keep up with me,
>  good job.
>* I thought you had to be in relatively good physical shape
>  to be a police officer.
>* I was going to be a cop, but I decided to finish high
>  school instead.
>* You're not going to check the trunk, are you?
>* Gee, that gut sure doesn't inspire confidence.
>* Didn't I see you get your butt kicked on COPS?
>* Wow, you look just like the guy in the picture on my
>  girlfriend's night stand.
>* Is it true that people become cops because they are too
>  dumb to work at McDonalds.
>* I pay your salary
>* So uh, you on the take or what?
>* Gee officer, that's terrific.  The last officer only gave
>  me a warning.
>* Do you know why you pulled me over?  Okay, just so one of
>  us does.
>* I was trying to keep up with traffic.  Yes, I know there
>  are no other cars around, that's how far they are ahead of
>  me.
>* What do you mean have I been drinking?  You are the
>  trained specialist.
>* Well, when I reached down to pick up my bag of crack, my
>  gun fell off of my lap and got lodged between the brake
>  and the gas pedal, forcing me to speed out of control.
>* Hey, is that a 9mm?  That's nothing compared to this 44
>   magnum.
>* Hey, can you give me another one of those full cavity
>  searches?