Re: Don't get mad, get even.

[Kneale Brownson <knotnook@traverse.com>]

So, Mike, can you run license plate numbers for all of us?

Secondly, you could carry a "fake" cell phone.

Kneale Brownson



At 09:01 AM 4/14/99 +0000, Mike Arman wrote:
>
>Since I don't (and won't) carry a gun while driving, I need to develop
>different methods of dealing with moron drivers "out there".
>
>I liked Igor K's cell phone solution, but I don't carry one of those, either.
>
>99.99% of the time, I just ignore automotive stupidity - if I responded to
>EVERY instance, I'd be upset all the time - and life is too short for that.
>
>But there *are* times that revenge can be sweet indeed. Here's three
>examples over a period of five years.
>
>Idiot #1 in a Blazer decided he was NOT going to let me into the right lane
>- I slowed down, he slowed down, I speeded up, he speeded up. Finally, I
>got behind him - and he's got a vanity plate with his name on it! What a
>moron!
>
>I simply looked him up in the local phone book, and son-of-a-gun, there he
>is, "Joe and Anne Moron", complete with their address. No, I didn't go
>visit him. But about a week later I did send him a nice X-rated postcard
>along the lines of "Hey tiger, I really enjoyed the other night with you
>and your Blazer; we should do that again sometime soon", and signed it "Hot
>Lips Helen". I presume he had some long and difficult explaining to do to
>Anne . . . Postcard cost me 20 cents to mail.
>
>Idiot #2 I got mad at. He backed into my parked car (luckily not the Audi),
>and drives off giving me the finger. Don't these fools realize there's a
>license plate on their cars? I then ran his tag number through an on-line
>database I have access to - and it told me EVERYTHING - name, address, auto
>insurance company, real estate owned, mortgage companies, professional
>licenses, vehicles owned . . . and social security number.
>
>Damn.
>
>Knowledge is power.
>
>"Dear (insurance company), please cancel policy number xxxxx on my 1996
>Wartwagon. Thank you, A. Schmuck, social security number etc." This cost me
>a whole 30 cents to mail.
>
>Well, the state of Florida takes a dim view of driving around without
>insurance, and they ALWAYS send a very nasty letter demanding your license
>plates RIGHT NOW if you don't have insurance. They'll come get you, too.
>
>After getting over the shock of getting this letter, he probably had a
>stroke when the insurance company said "Well sir, we have your letter right
>here canceling your insurance . . . "
>
>I'm sure he's still trying to straighten out the paperwork, buy new
>insurance, placate the MVB - and in a few months, I just might send the
>same letter to his homeowner's insurance company, and see how his mortgage
>company likes it.
>
>
>
>Idiot #3, driving an S-10 pickup truck, decided HE was going first, and of
>course slowed down when the road narrowed. Then he threw a beer can out the
>window (he missed). I got his license plate, backed off, and phoned a
>friend of mine in the local Sheriff's department. Seems that "Throwing an
>object or missile from a moving vehicle" is a FELONY - a few signatures and
>statements later, and I *know* that idiot is walking, and will be for a
>while. Any idea of the legal costs involved in defending a felony?
>
>
>Another lister cautioned against taking these clowns on head first - he
>said that you cannot know the enemy's resources and intentions. I agree
>1,000 percent with that. What these nincompoops don't realize is that their
>license plate tells who they are! Once you know who they are, and after
>making sure that they never find out who you are, the enemy can't know YOUR
>intentions or resources - and you can make their miserable little lives a
>little more so.
>
>Best Regards,
>
>Mike (don't tread on me) Arman ;-)